There are people who spend years in our lives and leave almost nothing behind. Then there are people who stay for a few months, a few conversations, or even a single afternoon, and somehow leave fingerprints all over the person we become.
That makes me wonder if they know the change they instilled in me. I wonder if my Physics teacher knows that he saw potential in me when I couldn't see it myself.
I wonder if my Sports teacher knows that entrusting me with the netball team taught me confidence and responsibility.
Seeing potential in someone is much like sunlight falling on a flower. The sun doesn't ask the flower to bloom overnight, it simply keeps showing up every day until, one day, the flower blossoms into something beautiful and fragrant.
Sometimes, all a person needs is someone who believes in them before they can believe in themselves.
Then I wonder if that friend who broke me ever realized that they taught me when to leave.
We spend so much time thinking about the people we'll marry or grow old with that we forget about the people who quietly shape us along the way. The ones who don't stay. The ones who are there just like snowflakes while it's snowing, only to melt away when the sun comes out. The ones who were never meant to stay forever, yet unknowingly leave behind little pieces of themselves that become part of us forever.
Perhaps we're all unknowingly becoming someone else's story, or at least a part of someone else's story. Maybe a smile we don't remember giving becomes the reason someone believes kindness still exists. Maybe a sentence we say in passing becomes something another person carries with them for years. Maybe we'll never know whose life we've quietly altered, just as they'll never know how much they altered ours. Maybe an 'obv' reply you sent to someone made them judge you.
How much of who I am actually belongs to me, and how much was quietly shaped by other people?
We are walking museums of other people.
Think about it.
The words you use. The way you comfort someone. The way you apologize. The music you listen to. The books you read. The way you love coffee before an exam. Heck, even the way you make banana bread. The way you fold your sleeves. The habit of saying Alhamdulillah when someone asks, "How's everything?" The way you laugh, or blush when someone compliments you.
How much of that was actually born with you?
Almost none of it.
Someone taught you. Someone inspired you. Someone unknowingly made it a part of who you are.
Someone made you persevere through difficult days. Someone made you laugh through them.
There are people who changed us without staying.
This is something I don't think we appreciate enough.
We think only permanent people matter.
But sometimes the person who stayed for eleven years changes you more than the person who stayed for a lifetime.
Maybe they gave you confidence.
Maybe they destroyed it.
Maybe they made you love writing.
Maybe they made you afraid of trusting.
Duration isn't always proportional to impact.
Some people never know the role they played.
Maybe your English teacher complimented an essay.
To her, it was Tuesday.
To you, it became the reason you write.
Maybe a friend once said,
"You're actually really good at explaining things."
They forgot it five minutes later.
You still remember it five years later.
Even strangers leave fingerprints.
The uncle who always smiled at you at the academy gate.
The girl who offered you her water bottle during an exam.
The woman who complimented your hairstyle.
The child who waved at you.
The waiter who remembered your order.
The shopkeeper who said,
"Allah aap ko khush rakhe."
Tiny moments. Huge effects.
Then there are people who hurt us.
Instead, they unknowingly taught us where our boundaries should have been.
They taught us what respect doesn't look like.
They taught us that our intuition deserves to be trusted.
They taught us that leaving isn't weakness.
Funny enough, they probably think they taught us nothing.
Some people become our inner voice.
When you're scared...
Whose words do you hear?
Your mother?
A teacher?
Your best friend?
Someone who once believed in you?
Or...
Someone who constantly criticized you?
Someone who complimented you?
Sometimes people leave.
Their voices don't.
The people who changed us probably don't remember us.
Because while we're carrying them...
They're living their lives.
Maybe your favorite professor doesn't remember your name anymore.
Maybe your childhood friend forgot your birthday years ago.
Meanwhile...
You're still carrying something they unknowingly gave you.
The scary part,or perhaps the beautiful part, is that you've probably changed people too.
Without even knowing.
Maybe someone smiled because you smiled first.
Maybe someone still remembers the compliment you forgot giving.
Maybe someone still remembers the hand you offered in friendship.
Maybe someone still remembers the way you calmed them down or simply sat beside them through a difficult time.
Maybe someone remembers how intimidated they were by you until your welcoming nature made them feel safe enough to open up.
You'll probably never know.
Maybe that's why I've stopped measuring people by how long they stayed.
Some remained for years and left almost nothing behind.
Others passed through my life like a season and somehow changed its climate forever.
They may never know the role they played in my story, just as I'll probably never know whose story I've quietly become a part of.
Perhaps that's the most beautiful thing about being human.
We are constantly leaving pieces of ourselves in places we'll never return to, while carrying pieces of people who may never realize they helped build the person we became.
And that's the beauty of it.
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